It’s January. And I usually love January.

Time to reflect and think about God’s promises for the year ahead.

Yet, in recent days, I’ve felt quite purposeless. 

I’ve resumed my daily school run, with three kids aged four and under. I’ve spent my time running… from playgroup… to doctors… to supermarket… to kitchen. 

But, I’ve felt a bit empty. And I’ve been trying to work out why.

Wednesday: I spent the morning in my house with my two littles.

My toddler played with sand, pulled all of the cushions off the sofa, demanded that he vacuum the actual sofa “cause it’s messy, mummy!” and ran his toy cars around the room. My baby went from hungry… to tired… to needs a change… and repeat. 

At 1 pm – I decided that both of my little people would benefit from a very long nap! So I put them in the car and drove. 

I felt anxious: Where was I going? What on earth was I doing with my day?

• Should I drive to a park, which park? 
• Should I drive to a shop, which shop?
• Should I drive to my daughter’s school and just park up outside seeing as we’ll be there soon anyway?

These were the thoughts that were running through my mind as I was driving aimlessly.

Then my toddler started screaming.

“STOP THE CAR!” 

He wanted background noise for sleeping (and was not being polite about it.)

I pulled into the nearest car park and got out. I bargained with my toddler about having a nap in the pram with a white noise machine… He agreed.

Here I was, at a shopping centre that I hadn’t planned to go to, with two overtired kids and no plan.

Then, just like that, I bumped into a friend and her two kids.

A friend that I had been trying to meet up with over Christmas, but it just hadn’t happened.

I was able to chat, chat, chat and had a coffee with them. 

This may not seem like a miracle to you. But to me I felt God’s presence in that not-so-coincidental moment.

I’ve been thinking about it, the bible says:

Unless the Lord builds the house,

    the builders labor in vain.

Unless the Lord watches over the city,

    the guards stand watch in vain. 

In vain you rise early

    and stay up late,

toiling for food to eat—

    for he grants sleep to those he loves.

Psalm 127, 1 – 2, NIV.

When we stick to our own plans, we are often unsuccessful. But when we listen to God’s plans for our lives, we thrive. 

If you are trying to build something into your life and God’s not in it, it won’t work.

So, we have to ask the question: Is God in it?

• Is God in your plans to move house?
• Is God in your plans to send your kid to that school, or that nursery?
• Is God in your plans to build that extension?
• Is God in your plans to get that job, start that business?
• Is God in your plans to go to that place?
• Is God in your plans to write that book?
• Is God in your plans to buy those things?

In that coffee shop encounter I realised that God had plans for certain friendships, in my life, to grow. How sweet is that? 

Beats my plans to loose weight, buy a new bathroom mirror and de-clutter every inch of my house!

Are any of your new year plans focused on growing relationships?

That is the thing about God: He always priorotises relationships. Whenever I’ve asked Him for a next step, His plans have always benefitted my relationships, above all else:

• When we tried to move house he told us to downsize so I could spend more time with my kids, rather than go back to a paid job.
• When I was thinking about going back to Leeds and taking up further studies after I had completed my University degree, God told me to stay in Liverpool and simply invest in relationships where I was, in a retail customer service role.
• When my husband and I wanted to spend three weeks in Uganda, helping a charity he used to serve with, God told us to instead go on a holiday just the two of us and so we bought a motorbike and toured a part of France.

God knows we’ll find purpose in our relationships.

When I start a new year, I start to dream about all that could happen in the next twelve months – Will I go here, will I achieve this, will I experience that?

It’s helpful to be reminded that God isn’t thinking that way. He’s turning our plans upside down. Let’s look at them from another angle:

• Maybe this is the year you’ll downsize your house so that you can spend less time at work? 
• Maybe this is the year you’ll write the book before your kids wake up, because God’s excited to meet you there?
• Maybe this is the year that business will spark because He has people for you to meet in that field?
• Maybe this is the year you ask God where He wants you to go?

Work out what God is building in your life, because if God builds it you won’t work at it in vain. You won’t put hours into it that amount to nothing. You will build something to last. Something to treasure. Something that satisfies that emptiness and lasts forever.

Grab a pen now and ask God who do you want me to invest in, where are the people you want me to meet this year?

He will build something that you never imagined and it will be more beautiful than any grand plans you could have mustered alone. 

Happy 2024!