I was having what could simultaneously be described as the best week and the worst week of 2014…

Worst week: 

I had been sleeping in a pop up tent…

In the rain…

On a hill. 

My hair was blue, because little children had been encouraged to pour slime over my head. 

Oh, and I didn’t really know anyone – even though I was volunteering at an event which catered for thousands of people.

Best week: 

I was worshipping with hundreds of other Jesus-believers, every morning and night. 

It was a me plus God week. I could hear Him loud and clear.

No one else really mattered. 

The team that I was volunteering for, was a kids club; A place where children could play and have fun, whilst parents listened to sermons in another nearby tent. It wasn’t really my “thing…”

Yet, surprisingly, this was the setting I found myself in when I heard these seven precious words…

“God has made you uncomfortable in comfort.” 

Honestly: I thought these seven words would mean that I would end up on a far away African plain – serving my God thousands of miles away. 

Nevertheless, here I am.. Living in inner city Liverpool. With one husband, three kids and a VW Touran parked outside. Facing a cost of living crisis and trying to work out how much screen time is too much (…for me, never mind the kids!) 

My life is a blur of school runs, playgroups, playdates and church activities. 

It’s brilliant!

And yet, I am spiritually uncomfortable.

I’ve been slowly writing my way through the book of James. You can find it in the bible, towards the end of the book. Today’s passage is stirring up something within:

“Let the brother in humble circumstances glory in his high position [as a born again believer, called to the true riches and to be an heir of God]; and the rich man is to glory in being humbled [by trials revealing human frailty, knowing true riches are found in the grace of God], for like the flower of the grass he will pass away For the sun rises with a scorching wind and withers the grass; its flower falls off and its beauty fades away; so too will the rich man, in the midst of his pursuits, fade away.“

James 1: 9 – 11, AMP.

While I am often tempted to see myself as a sister in humble circumstances, I know that I am privileged. I know that a roof over my head, a full belly and a fridge full of food makes me a rich woman in this world.

The rich person is to glory in being humbled.

We are supposed to thank God when we get ourselves into a situation that makes us realise that we desperately, desperately need our saviour.

We are supposed to shout our hallelujahs when we realise that nothing else will ever satisfy us, apart from He who created us.

I don’t know about you but my prayers are not: “Thank you God for this humbling situation that makes me stressed out to the max!”

If I’m honest, I pray for the trials and tribulations to end fast. (Like, yesterday.)

But wow, I’ve been missing the point. I’ve been mentally beating myself up, thinking that the trials are all my fault and praying for them to disappear quickly.

I’m missing the point: These trials are opportunities to get on my knees and get even more desperate for all of God.

Desperate for more of my healer.

Desperate for more of my provider.

Desperate for more of my ever-present help.

What if my trials are supposed to make me belly-aching hungry for more of heaven on earth?

Instead of sitting with “nice” prayers, asking God to politely make this thing pass, what if I am supposed to cry out for the God of the Bible? 

What if I am supposed to plead for the miracle-working, body-healing, dead-rising, friend of sinners to move here and now in this world?

I want more.

I am hungry for more of God.

• And as I write to you today, I wonder: Have some of your dreams come true?

• I wonder: Are you living a comfortable life with friends, food and family?

• I wonder: Is there one area of your life that you keep politely praying God would change?

Please sit forward a second because I think God has something to tell you and I:

This is not the time to settle.

I’m not saying: “Give up on praying for your trials to end…” I’m saying: “Make your prayers bigger now.”

This is not the time to circle around the same old prayers.

This is not the time to have question marks about the things we are praying for.

I believe God is calling His church (his people) to be desperate for Him, again. Right now.

Honestly, I believe that God has heard your problem and He will give you all you need to overcome it…

But, actually, this trial is about you discovering that you need Him more than you need the answer to the problem you keep praying for.

The question is: Are you desperate for your God?

I think God sees these invisible boundary lines that we each have within our hearts. 

The places we are not willing to surrender. The things we are too embarrassed to do for God. 

He sees them all and yet He is asking us to be more desperate for Him and His power.

No more keeping face; no more protecting those limit lines.

Want to be blessed, favoured and spiritually prosper? Great, you can be.

But you’ve got to be desperate for all of God. 

You’ve got to know that true riches come from Him and His ever-working, we-don’t-deserve it, mighty and powerful grace.

True riches don’t come when you get the job, the comfy family life or the perfect community.

True riches aren’t ever answered prayers. 

True riches are simply God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. 

Can you be more desperate for the three-in-one, than any other thing this world has to offer?

Ask God to show you where your desperation currently lies and how to turn it over for Him alone.