What a weird ending…

I have spent 10 whole blog posts – totalling about 25 hours of my time – writing about the book of Esther. (You can click back to post 1, here.)

After weeks of ruminating on this brilliant bible story, I have finally reached the end.

I was surprised to find out: the last chapter is a short, one paragraph endnote, which describes the introduction of a new tax, includes a rhetorical question and doesn’t even mention our heroine, Esther.

Not what I expected.

To be honest with you: I struggle to end these blog posts.

In fact, I have always struggled with endings.

Whether I am ending a short story, ending a lovely holiday or ending a relationship: I always feel challenged by the process of ending.

Finishing well is something to be commended.

I am reminded of this bible verse:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

Hebrews 12: 1-2. ESV.

Today I have three ways to finish well.

1. Lay Your Life Down.

Sometimes, though, I don’t want to run my race.

Sometimes, like this week, I take my eyes off Jesus. I put my eyes on overwhelm, on stress, on striving and I miss the point.

We all do it, sometimes.

However, the last chapter of Esther tells me that Mordecai ran his race successfully:

For Mordecai the Jew was second in rank to King Ahasuerus, and he was great among the Jews and popular with the multitude of his brothers, for he sought the welfare of his people and spoke peace to all his people.

Esther 10: 3, ESV.

Mordecai is the man that raised Esther. The man that raised her to love God and to do all that she was called to do.

Mordecai is the man that advised the king well. The man that put others before himself and chose to do things God’s way, however wild and scary God’s way looked.

This little, random paragraph at the end of the book of Esther tells me that Mordecai ran with endurance the race that was set before him, looking to his Yahweh God, who made a way for him and his people to thrive.

I find myself bugged by that. Because, this week, I have very much wanted to go my own way and do my own thing.

I keep stumbling. Not really listening to what God wants me to do – just doing my own thing and hoping He will bless it.

I am overwhelmed because doing it my way is tiring. Yet I slip straight back into my way every morning, so it seems.

As ever, another wise friend spoke to me this week. She said:

“Instead of picking things up, try laying things down.”

It’s interesting that the previously mentioned Hebrews verse says this:

“Let us […] lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely.”

Hebrews 12: 1, ESV, my abbreviations.

Here’s what I am wondering this week…

• Are you throwing off your way and sticking to Yahweh?
• Are you laying down EVERY weight?
• Are you shaking off EVERY, last, tiny sin?

Because, here is the thing: I want you to be a Mordecai and get to the end of your God-given race with a selfless heart.

I really want that for you.

A couple of nights ago I wrote my life out on six sheets of paper.

I drew spider diagrams of every area of my life. One page was entitled: “Raising children.” around those two words I jotted all of my challenges and hopes related to raising kids.

I then literally laid all of these spider diagrams down on my desk. I then said to God:

“I give it all back to you.”

For a couple of days after completing this task, I kept reminding myself that I had laid everything down.

Doing that made me so aware of how I just don’t include God in a lot of things.

I picked things up when He didn’t tell me to.

On a couple of occasions I knew God was instructing me not to do something, but I picked it up anyway.

On another occasion, I didn’t want to do something and He told me to show up.

Hey, if I was sat across the table from you right now I would be advising you to grab hold of everything that God has for you.

Don’t forget to include God in your coming and your going.

I think it is time you and I laid it all down again.

2. Have Hope for Your Future.

In Esther 10 it reads:

And all the acts of [King Xerces] power and might, and the full account of the high honor of Mordecai, to which the king advanced him, are they not written in the Book of the Chronicles of the kings of Media and Persia? 

Esther 10: 2, ESV, my brackets and exaggerations.

This is a funny, rhetorical question. The writer could have just told us that there’s more in the book of Chronicles…

Yet, we are asked a three-word question:

“Are they not?”

I think that sometimes we need to give ourselves a talking to.

When we are down and wondering what the point is – we need to flick through the bible and remember that God is real. He does great things.

• Stories of His wonder are in the bible… Are they not?
• Stories of healing are in the bible… Are they not?
• Stories of redemption are in the bible… Are they not?

Some of you might need to write a list of great things that God has already done in your life.

Because, we are not going to get to the end of this race if we only see overwhelm and only feel frustration. We need hope. We need to remember our God is hope. There is hope for your future because God has a good plan for your life and He has done some absolutely mad, crazy, wonderful things before. So won’t He do it again?

3. Love your God with All You Have Got!

To end this blog post about endings… I want to write about tax.

Esther is a story of freedom, redemption and staying on your God given course. The Jews overcame annihilation because of what Esther did.

Yet, the last chapter of Esther reads:

King [Xerxes] imposed tax on the land and on the coastlands of the sea.

Esther 10: 1, ESV, my brackets.

Why would it end with a note on taxes?

I thought about this and I am sure that someone who has read Chronicles and has more contextual awareness of the bible can give a better answer…

Yet, I was reminded today that the point of the bible is always to exalt God.

King Xerxes mighty kingdom is nowhere near as powerful and awe-dropping as God’s kingdom.

God is powerful. And I think we have to be so intentional to remember that.

We can believe in Jesus and go to church on Sunday… Or, we can love Jesus with our whole minds; we can adore Him with all we’ve got.

It’s a choice we get to make every day… Will we give our Jesus some love today, or will we focus on our clingy sin and the weight of the world’s pressures?

Jesus is the joy set before us. Jesus is our best friend and our saviour.

It is a bit shocking, when I think about it, how ungrateful I can be to a God that literally saved my life.

I think it is important to take moments in which we just give God some love. A “thank you,” a song, a food delivery to someone he puts on your heart.

We mustn’t forget that all things point to the glory of God. He is the only one worthy of our praise; He is the only one worthy of our lives.

My ending: An encouragement for your week!

So, this week: It is time to check yourself.

Are you going to end your race well if you keep running as you are?

• Do you need to shake off some clingy sin and overwhelm?
• Do you need to remember how good your God is?
• Or, perhaps you need to stop and show love for your God?

Whatever your action plan, I want to remind you that God’s way is worth all of your sacrifice.

I know you are tired and weary sometimes. I know life can be tough.

But you are completely capable of finishing your race well. You can get rid of anything stopping you from pursuing Jesus. You can absolutely re-tune yourself to run this thing well, even if you’ve gone a little off-track.

Praying for you.